Sometimes parenting can be hard as f**k.
A single day can feel endless.
Yet suddenly 6 months has flown by.
I have NO idea why that is but we’ve all felt it at some point haven’t we?
My daughter is now 4 and I’m starting to feel like I’m out the other side a little but I can’t deny there aren’t the really REALLY tough days still.
I think this is why we put off capturing our ‘real’ memories.
Stick with me on this one…
We worry too much.
We think we need to show ‘perfect’ all the time.
We put too much pressure on ourselves over EVERYTHING.
Imagine booking a professional family photographer to come and do a family photoshoot with you all?
I’m sure you can tell Ellie (above) is pretty excited by the idea of a shoot, but her Mum had the typical photoshoot nerves…
You’d probably worry your kids won’t cooperate.
They’ll be the worst version of themselves and test you to breaking point (all while you grit your teeth and try to look good for the camera).
They’re going to pull those stupid faces and hate posing for the camera.
You’ll look exhausted because you’ve not slept in 3 months/years.
The house is an absolute mess.
When in reality, that is our reality.
Our kids do like to pick their nose/eat dirt/fall out with each other/fight over toys/make a mess.
When the kids are there it’s highly likely the house WILL be messy and a little chaotic.
I know I for one need a good afternoon all alone to get the house looking presentable only for a 4 year old whirlwind to cause destruction in around 6 minutes haha.
We become so focused on what others may think and what we ‘should’ be doing that we’re missing one of the most amazing things…real family connections.
“The usual stuff – would the kids co-operate, would my bum look big, would we pull awkward camera faces.
The kids didn’t co-operate perfectly but it didn’t matter because what you captured was a really accurate representation of life right now – I wanted something that I’ll look back on in years to come and go “ahhhhh they were so little, and I wish I could turn back the clock etc” instead of focusing on how hard it feels right now.
You captured loads of really lovely moments / interactions that I wasn’t really aware of at the time – and I never realised I looked at my kids like I do!
We didn’t pull awkward faces because there was no telling us to sit and smile at the camera!”
Capturing ‘real life’ moments as a family photographer help you focus on the ‘good stuff’
On the days I allow myself to let go a little (not fully, I’m yet to master that even after years of yoga) I find that’s when, as a family, we really embrace the chaos instead of fighting it.
It’s in those moments that as a family photographer and videographer my families begin to let go and enjoy real life as it is now.
That infamous ‘being in the moment’.
The ‘meltdown’ they were worried about did happen and that’s all they then worry about after the shoot.
But, the cuddles and tender moments that followed after were the ones I saw.
A moment completely lost without that picture because the focus was on the stress of the meltdown.
So, for me and my families, seeing those connections and tender moments in the calm after the storm are the most reassuring.
The moments that help us see how rewarding parenting can be. Seeing yourself in the frame and seeing how you adore your kids, and how they adore you.
Seeing what someone else sees can be what’s needed to stop us from focusing on the challenges, stop giving ourselves a hard time.
Instead enabling us to see those moments we would’ve missed because our focus was elsewhere.
Self care can be as much about reflection as it can be about right now.
Reminding yourself every now and then that you’re doing AMAZING and your kids do genuinely love and adore you.
Instead of focusing on how hard life feels right now, remember it will pass.
Documenting your days enables you to look back and be reminded how special a time it really was.
Today may be one of those never ending days but try to remember they’ll be some really special moments sprinkled around, maybe having someone capture your ‘real life’ will help you see them for yourself…
If you were to recommend us to your best friend, what would you say to them?
“That they’d get a really honest, genuine reflection of their family life as it is, that they wouldn’t need to put on a performance or be on best behaviour, and to absolutely go for it, as they’ll look back on this in years to come and be glad they did!”
Can’t see yourself being in front of the camera?
You’re not alone.
Check out this family blog post if you feel you need some reassurance it’s not as scary as it seems…
When should you plan a family photography shoot?
Every year? Every milestone?
This blog is all about the best times to capture those wonderful family memories to enjoy for years to come…